24 years ago....'Til Death Do Us Part....#2...and it still stinks.....

24 years ago 11/25/89....'Til Death Do Us Part....#2...and it still stinks.....

I still can't figure out what that means..." 'Til death do us part"?????? Yeah, then what? I'm free? I can start again? I can do something different? Or do I continue on the same way..just alone? I hate that phrase....

It sounded so permanent at our wedding..." "til death do us part". Wow, this means a really long time...forever even....we will grow old together and it will seem like forever....so when we got old, when we died, we will have experienced all life had to offer....and then "til death do us part" was going to be okay because would have really lived life and would be ready to live forever in Heaven.

So that got screwed up.....by my standards. God's plan, God's plan, God's plan..yeah yeah yeah. I know there is a plan. HIS plan A, MY plan Z.....not my plan A....B...C or D..or.....or.......or

When you get it in your head that life is about growing up, getting married, having kids, having weddings, having grandkids, maybe even great-grandkids and the person you were supposed to share that all with is gone, it just seems like my story is over and I'm just in limbo. Yes, I will have weddings and grandkids and maybe great-grandkids (God willing) but it feels like something is so not right.

I have had several people ask me if I would date again, marry again. The question makes me want to puke. My response is "not unless God has a sick sense of humor". Been there, done that, not interested because I had the best and do not care to start again. For many reasons that are locked up in my little brain, it's not even a situation I care to ever entertain. Thinking a dog is more of a practical answer for companionship.

A while ago a friend who was just married 25 years posted some music from back then. Reminded me of the music that Dave and I would call "our" songs. One song in particular was supposed to be our first dance. But back in the days before iTunes and YouTube, we were at the mercy of the record stores and this one-hit wonder was not to be found. But I did find it on YouTube the other day and laughed because it sounded like it should have been in the movie "Rock of Ages" and cried because it was OUR song. So yes, I'm posting it so you can hear it. Missing my guy every single day, in so many ways. Thankful for the beautiful girls we had that comfort me and love me and make me proud. Happy 24th Anniversary honey..wish we were spending it together.....

When I'm With You Lyrics 

I never needed love like I need you
And I never lived for nobody, but I live for you
Oooh, babe, lost in love is what I feel when I'm with you

Maybe it's the way you touch me with the warmth of a sun
Maybe it's the way you smile, I come all undone
Oooh, babe, lost in love is that I feel when I'm with you

Baby, oh I get chills when I'm with you
Baby, my world stands still when I'm with you
When I'm with you

I never cared for nobody like I care for you
And I never wanted to share the things I want to share with you
Oooh, babe, lost in love is what I feel when I'm with you

Baby, oh I get chills when I'm with you
Baby, my world stands still when I'm with you
When I'm with you

Baby, oh I get chills when I'm with you
Baby, my world stands still when I'm with you
When I'm with you
When I'm with you
When I'm with you...